Wednesday, December 21, 2005

Business Casual with a Bullet

My business casual days are numbered for sure, and if today is representative of those days it's going to be a fucking celebration and a half when I split this joint. My mood today was making the Misanthropy post seem downright chipper. Some bullet points:

- Like a shark can smell blood from miles away, Shark Hunter Guy can apparently pick up the scent of disparaging words floating in the World Wide Web. There had been a sharp decrease in SH comments after I posted about them (here and here). I even caught myself about to bait him once. But I got one today. The old standby: "shark hunter."

- Business Casual TODD (Tip Of Da Day): Contrary to popular belief, it is quite possible to be Business Casual whilst shaving every other day. Wear your nice shirt on the day you don't shave and it will cancel the scruff out. Let's review: Shaven + lower end of biz cazh = Unshaven + higher end of biz cazh.

- I may have angled myself into position to snag a severance package for my exit. It's not a done deal, so I don't want to jinx it, but we're right in the middle of a Reorg and I floated a little hypothetical question to my boss and he might be hooking me up. The tremendous upside: 10 weeks of pay and insurance. Now that's what I call an exit strategy. Tremendous downside: I need to work on seeing if I can make it sooner rather than later. They're still sorting out the Reorg and it might take a couple months for any layoffs to take effect. The plan had been to drop the Quit Bomb on January 2nd and have my absolute last day be Jan 24, allowing me to roll into my 33rd birthday, biz-cazh-free. You don't want to be schleppin for the man on the first day of your Jesus year. Hopefully he can swing this mid to late January or early February at the latest. Pushing it into March would make me consider saying fuck it and just quitting. Seriously, that's how much I need to leave this job. I'd think about turning down 10 weeks of full pay if it meant having to be there an extra month. I'm losing it. So, if I get the Sever, that means that I don't even have to get a part time job until Julyish. I'd also be eligible for Unemployment, but I'm not sure if I'd do that. On the one hand, I feel like if you're able minded and bodied, you shouldn't be leaning on Unemployment; on the other hand, we are under the rule of Bush the Lesser, and I'd be happy to contribute to higher unemployment while he's in office. Either way, the Sever would be fucking fantastic. Oh, shit. Did I just jinx it?

- I'm watching the new Deal Or No Deal prime time game show right now, hosted by ... that's right, the voice of the Gremlins ... Howie Mandell. It's unbelievably stupid. And therefore I love it.

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