Tuesday, April 17, 2007

Typical Red Sox Fans

How do Red Sox fans celebrate Patriots Day? Drunken early afternoon food fights in the stands at Fenway. All class. You'd never see something like this at Yankee Stadium. I love Jerry Remy breaking down the replays - "Here comes the pizza right here!"

It's actually a great shot because the guy was in motion and you'd have to think the aerodynamics of chucking a slice of pizza on a cold wet day must be tricky. According to the Herald, there was some shit talking that preceded the actual incident regarding the pizza in question.

“They had been giving us (expletive) about [having a whole pizza in the stands],” Madore said. “Next thing I know, there’s a fly ball to left field and it goes foul and my buddy says, ‘You want some pizza now?’ And he hits him right in the face. Hey, the guy wasn’t paying attention. When you’re in the stands you’ve got to be ready for anything - a foul ball, a flying slice of pizza, everything.” (hat tip to Deadspin via N-Lo)

In other Boston sports news, The Sports Guy sums up nicely the absurdity of Doc Rivers getting a contract extension to continue to coach the Celtics. He's pretty much right on and I'd definitely rather see Carlisle, Skiles, Van Gundy, or even Ainge coaching next year. I'd rather see that douchebag who threw the pizza coaching. But, as always, Simmons has to end the article with another of his trademark wrap-up nostalgic statements. His articles are much more entertaining when you skip the last sentence. Which brings me to my:

Top Ten Simmons Lines That Could End Any Of His Articles:

10. the kid with the oversized glasses trusted Red completely. So did everyone. And watching that tiny version of myself on TV ... I couldn't help but feel a little jealous.

9. A little piece of me died that day. A little piece of all of us did.

8. Sports? "Just a game"? I don't think so.

7. I was smiling at the outcome of the game, but I was smiling more at my daughter smiling. She finally got it.

6. As far as body parts go, boxing's about fists and skulls, sure. But in the end, it's about heart.

5. And if you want to talk nicknames, I'll take "Legend" any day.

4. Maybe so. But I know one thing: pitchers and catchers report in 67 days...

3. He was, simply put, the best. And for once, I'm not talking about sports. I'm just ... a Guy.

2. The Sports Gal used to say that "the agony and the ecstasy" was stretching it a bit. She doesn't say that anymore. Sometimes, I wish she would.

1. And Now I Can Die In Peace. Really.


blythe said...

oh massholes, how i miss you!

Dan said...

good for a laugh, eh? What do they throw at games in Oklahoma?

I was at a Sox game one time on a Saturday afternoon when the college kids were still around, sitting in the bleachers about 15 rows back. It was a sauced up and frisky crowd. There was this guy in the first row, who was balding a bit, wearing an old Bledsoe jersey, completely shitfaced, and he kept standing up with his two beers to engage the whole bleachers section behind him. We immediately started talking shit to him, as did everyone else. One friend got the crowd to start a "COMBOVER" chant at him. Some rednecks came in late, sat in front of us, quickly gauged the situation, and started chucking popcorn at the guy whenever he turned around. This went on for a few innnings, as the guy kept getting drunker. Then during one exchange, I saw something out of the corner of my eye, coming from a few rows back - probably 20 rows away from "Bledsoe". I trained in on it and realized that it was a hot dog flying through the air. A $5 Fenway Frank, uneaten, in the bun, chucked 20 rows at some drunk tool. Obviously I wouldn't be telling this story if it didn't hit him square in the head. Funniest thing I've ever seen at a sports event. Someone paid $5, took their one shot, and nailed it. Eventually the bouncers kicked him out (I think all the beer he spilled was draining down into the bullpen) to a standing ovation.

Dewy24 said...

Of course behavior like this never occurs in the bleachers of Yankee Stadium where there is much tea drinking and finger sandwiches and discussion of their respective Mensa chapters.

Dewy24 said...

I think this is an excellent example of the fine level of sportsmanship and good character at Yankee Stadium.


Dan said...

how do you know those were yankees fans? Might have just been non-affiliated homophobes.

Dan said...

did you watch this one:


Dearest Cupcake said...

Damn, Boston, I miss you too. Best part of that clip: "he got hit with some type of sub sadwich or something" in that unmistakable accent. My goal today is to work the phrase some-type-of-sub-sandwich-or-something into at least 2 conversations, without the baseball reference.

Dan said...

I'll be really impressed if you can work the "got hit with" in there too. keep us posted.